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Holding On – the Worst of All Habits by Dadhichi Toth

The worst of all habits in my estimation is that of holding on. Holding on to people, situations, things… ahh things! But worst of all our ideas, concepts and belief systems which for most part are almost impossible to outgrow and follow most us to our resting place, the grave. The flipside of this karmic vinyl record is letting go. We hear this statement all the time like a top 10 hit on that vinyl – “Come on, let go!”  I can hear the music in the background as I chant the song “Come on baby let it go, yeah let it go oooh waaaaaah”. But singing it doesn’t make it so. By continually holding on, letting go is not possible – at all. The art of letting go is no less an art than that of Picasso, Kandinsky and Salvador Dali who painted their artistic magic on canvas. This release, of letting go can only be painted on the canvas of our creative awareness. The spirit is eroded by entrenched yet outdated religious and philosophical belief systems which are usually deeply embedded onto the innocent young child-mind by culture and dogmatic family lineages. These half-baked truths perennially vomited inregurgitato tattoo conceptual ideologies into these children, their children and their children’s children….. and so on down the genetic line.

It’s well-known that dysfunctional legacies such as violence, abuse etc are passed down the family tree like a pretty coloured baton by a well-trained team of Olympic relay runners. It would be an entirely different matter if these were passed courteously, at least in good sportsmanship, rather than brutally bashing billions with it as if it’s some sort of divine weapon. We know that extremists and radical religious groups of many persuasions use hypnotic linguistics to indoctrinate children whose minds are subtle receivers. Relentlessly yet helplessly imbibing those belief systems eventually making them their own.  And so the cycle continues. McDonald’s and other multinational companies with cutting edge marketers know full well how that impressionable young mind is tender, succulent prey for the Corporate Greed God or CoGG if we could call it that. In other words the child in due course becomes a cog in the money machine of modern industrialised planet Earth. That’s a tangential statement you might say but hang on a moment there…which of the big religions doesn’t have money? And lots of it. Come on. They are the biggest of the biggest when it comes to amassing gargantuan fortunes. They make banks and corporations shrink in comparison. So it looks like McDonald’s and other multinationals and their promoters/advertisers are only just cottoning onto the embed techniques that religious and political leaders have known about for centuries. Same crap – different control objectives. One ( religion ) controls your heart and soul, the other ( banking and material ideologies ) controls your body and mind ( with the help of media, fabricated news, information services and yeah, sadly, education from Kindy on….)

On a less philosophical level, people are a real source of attachment. Attachment to people is part of any relationship. Spiritual clarity works on breaking down this “holding-on-to” habit by slowly creating an inner atmosphere of dispassion. These relationships include parents to children, children to parents, siblings to siblings, lovers to lovers, spouses to spouses, friends to friends and even gurus/mentors to students. There are many other non-conventional relationships so include those please. All these are representative of the many permutations that attachment takes. Yet time is the catalyst for all change and this holding on is the resistance – of not wanting things that are nice and pleasurable to end and vice versa. And this principle of attraction and repulsion ( raga-dwesha in the ancient Hindu psycho/spiritual writings )  is at the heart of our swinging life pendulum that drives each and every one of us mostly unconsciously though. This is the desire for continuance and is entrenched in our DNA, in our desire to survive and extend and ‘immortalize’ ourselves through our offspring, ensuring that we in some form or other survive death. One of the more enduring forms of attachment is the love of a parent for a child. Disengaging, dispassionate practice as indicated by many philosophies in the East is indeed one which we are resistant to the core of our being as seen by how deep and abiding parental love is.

Then there are situations.  Situations often arise in which we find ourselves resistant to change. Remaining in a situation gives one a sense of security but at the same time ossifies the spirit and stifles that blazing life force. Fear of lack, of not getting enough money or prestige pushes people into the corner of icy cold comfort. And pushing back down into the black heart any unsavoury circumstance which arises causes many to also maintain less than healthy marital and/or intimate relationships. Fear of the unknown and moving on is often a complaint I hear with hundreds and hundreds of clients. Many would rather be unhappily in love than not in love at all. How sad. Dealing with these circumstances requires simple awareness even in the midst of rather trying situations in which we may lose our composure. By understanding that these situations have their own purpose and karmic lesson can help us endure and welcome them in a spirit of understanding rather than resisting. Often the situation is linked to the people we are attached to. The situations themselves are an extension of those relationships.

On a planetary note, the attraction-repulsion principle is ruled by Venus and Saturn. Venus is the all attractive, with its primary force which drives us to attach and enjoy the pleasures of this earthly dimension. The modern day world is in the grip of Venus, considered an Asura or demonic force in ancient Vedic Astrology. Saturn on the other hand destroys all that with time. Saturn is the very principle of time. Modern astrologers also include Uranus and Pluto as generational and sometimes personal catalysts for change and letting go although their action is very different in reality.

The beauty of youth slowly but surely fades over several decades and in this way the natural course of life is meant to help us lessen our attachment to the world of sense, name and form. It usually doesn’t though. We just keep holding on, getting monthly facials, cosmetic surgery and doing anything to remain beautiful and wrinkle free. We see ourselves in our mirrors each day when we stare into the forever changing and decaying image that we thought was us but just isn’t anymore! Any form of resistance against the natural operational energy of Saturn is however beset with great pain physically and psychologically too. The assistance of Jupiter in the horoscope will help one philosophically adjust the mentality of these natural processes of life and ageing and thereby lessen the impact of resistance, of desperately holding on to letting go.

Things. Things often have a strong imprint of the past. Mental images, nostalgic mind forms like fragrant flowers with their aromatic scents accompany objects in the same powerful manner. Often long forgotten memories resurface simply through the sight of an object. Jewellery for example. The smell or olfactory sense often accompanies objects hidden away for long periods. And aromas can restore all sorts of long forgotten memories and emotions. Objects in a strange way do the same thing. Artefacts, mementos of the past are connected to the relationships and situations that we are attached to and somehow become saturated with those memories and with the same emotional force as when first experienced them. We all want in some way to emotionally relive those past experiences through artefacts, scents, music and of course memories connected to those things. If the mementos have been in the attic or an old suitcase with mothballs or other perfumes the nostalgia is concurrent with the sight and smell of the object after years of absence.  Naturally these things have no value in themselves, only what one projects and superimposes on these objects. This is why in monastic traditions surrendering one’s possessions and taking vows of poverty are considered a prerequisite on the path of renunciation.

Just touching again on belief systems and religious ideologies, resistance finds its way into the physical dimension of our existence. The resistance to change manifests itself firstly as endocrine, hormonal-chemical responses in the brain and body as emotions and through intricate psychophysical processes the muscle, fat, blood and bodily tissues are affected, and perfectly, holographically, reflect those very mental and emotional processes over time. Yes, even our wrinkles are mirrors of our mental and emotional patterns, etched on our faces over time. The simple relaxation of muscle, through stretching, exercise, walking and yoga etc relax and reverses this process – chemically at that. These are just a few ways in which a resistance to change can be released from our lives.  

A simple exercise is to daily withdraw the senses from their objects, if only for a little while and rest in your own true nature, devoid of things. This practice is powerful and will help dislodge the false notion that you need anything at all for happiness. One’s own Self is indeed happiness and when that understanding arises, even in the midst of playing out this drama of life, one’s inner peace will not be ruffled although outwardly there may be some residual reactions observed by others. The depths of the ocean remain still while the storm rages away on the surface.

Dadhichi tothDadhichi Toth, is one of Australia’s most respected astrologers and face readers and is also the founder and CEO of www.astrology.com.au. Having 32 years practical experience in the field  with  more than 10,000 personal consultations to his credit — including celebrity, corporate and political clientele — Dadhichi is also an author having written the annual best selling Astrology Forecast series for Harlequin Mills and Boon for nine years. Dadhichi can be contacted at dadhichi@astrology.com.au