Forgiving others is not always an easy thing, especially if you’ve been hurt deeply. But I thought I would extend the concept of Christmas at this time to include this charitable act which is often a very difficult thing for many of us. How does the art of forgiveness impact on each of the twelve signs of the Zodiac?
Because each Zodiac personality sees life and deals with people and circumstances so differently it’s important to understand how each sign can use its unique character traits to break free of these self-limiting patterns of holding grudges and not forgiving others for the wrongs committed against us. The converse of this is where we may have done wrong to others and find the forgiveness we so deeply desire in our lives is not forthcoming.
This flip side of the coin is sometimes unbearable and I have many clients consulting me ( in particular parents ), estranged from children suffering desperately for years – sometimes until the end of their lives not being able to reconcile, simply for the reason that the child they hurt has never been able to forgive them.
With Aries, we note the fiery passion of Mars which is often ruthless, bold and impulsive. If you are born under this sign you are likely to say and do things in a harsh and impetuous way without thinking. If you hurt someone it’s not always intentionally but the problem is that you are unconscious about it and if others bring this to your attention you may not be aware of what they are talking about. The theme therefore is to remain more aware, more conscious of what you are saying and to note the nuances in others’ facial characteristics, body language and the way people react to you when you say and do things. Generally for an Aries, forgiveness is not too difficult. Your anger is often short lived and you are able to reconcile and let go of things much more easily than some of the other signs of the Zodiac. The fact that yours is a cardinal or movable sign means you are able to move on and let bygones be bygones.
Taurus for you, forgiveness may not always be an easy thing due to the fixity of your sign. Venus too endows you with a great deal of passion and usually I speak of this passion in terms of the sensual excessive side of life but we can extend this concept to such things as emotional patterns and your inability to break through or to let go of things. Therefore there are some Taureans that I have known who tend to hold grudges and get stuck in a fixed pattern of thinking and reacting to others. The lesson for you this Christmas and my best advice is to use a little bit of mental WD40 to loosen the cogs of change and to get the machinery of flexibility moving freely again.
Gemini, you are the sort of person who is able to freely and intellectually move in different directions and your communication skills are great. So this does tend to give you the edge when it comes to dealing with others especially when you have been hurt or you have hurt them. Maintaining an open line of communication is always the best policy irrespective of what side of the forgiveness equation you are on. By speaking about how you feel and truly endeavouring to understand the other persons view point can help you break through any of the barriers you have in your relationships. Let’s just hope this Christmas you are able to cast aside your cynicism and some of the sarcasm that is sometimes found in the Gemini temperament to reconcile from a really heartfelt space.
Cancer, you are moody, self-absorbed and often unable to let go of the deep dark moods you feel. Coupled with these changing emotional tides due to the rulership of the Moon, you also have a tendency to be hypersensitive and this is a dangerous recipe especially if you are working towards perfecting the art of forgiveness. The upside of being a Cancer when it comes to these issues is that you are capable of a high degree of empathy and the key to your forgiveness is compassion – simply putting yourself in the shoes of the other person to see just how you’d feel if someone wasn’t able to forgive you. Through this practise you’ll make great spiritual strides in your life and relationships during this Christmas period. When dealing with many family members it’s all the more important for those born under the sign of Cancer to handle their family relationships with deeper insight now.
Leo, you are one of the most fixed signs of the Zodiac, fiery, bright and at times self-righteous, even pompous in your approach. Like your fire brother, Aries, there are times when you feel as if what you are saying and doing is harmless yet other people take your statements and actions to heart. Then you wonder why at some future time you are not being treated in the way you feel you deserve. It’s imperative for you to reach out and ask others for their opinion of your behaviour and as hard as this may be, the one thing that will help you to evolve very speedily in your personal relationship. In being able to openly accept constructive criticism you’ll pave the way for more flexible relationship and a greater ability to forgive others and also to forgive yourself.
Virgo, the art of forgiveness may be a little easier for you than others due to the fact that your key signature as far as personality is concerned is service and improving things. But this can at times be a double-edged sword for you as your ideals and expectations are very hard for other people to meet. Consequently you tend to be hypercritical and demanding of others especially when you see attributes and potential in them that they yet can’t. Intellectual patience is important for you and this in itself can bypass many of the problems you have regarding forgiveness. As the old adage goes, “an ounce of prevention is far better than a pound of cure”.
Libra, Librans do tend to want peace but at what cost I ask? Sometimes even if a Libran hasn’t exactly done anything wrong, for the sake of peace they will apologise and ask for forgiveness. “Sorry, I hope I didn’t hurt your feelings”. I hear this often, almost as an unconscious regurgitation from some deep, dark subconscious corner of the Libran psyche. Yes forgiveness is essential in relationships but not at the expense of dignity and self-respect. On the point of a genuine need for forgiveness though, the Libran is accommodating and will give people a second chance if only for the sake of keeping that peace. Finding a balance between peace and being true to yourself is a difficult life challenge for you. No wonder the scales are your icon.
Scorpio, the eighth sign of the Zodiac, fixed, brooding, deep and mysterious is not the most amenable sign to forgiveness and in fact I have met many Scorpions who harbour lifetime grudges and vendettas, being unable to forgive. This is a shame because the power of forgiveness has as its greatest recipient the one who does the forgiving. Forgiveness is not for the other person but for one’s own self a great gift. Those who are unforgiving carry a burden, a deep seated resentment which slowly deteriorates the inner spirit and finally the health and vitality of the person. The truly transformative and regenerative influence of the Scorpionic energies can only be had if the art of forgiveness is truly taken on board and practised.
Sagittarius, this ninth sign of the Zodiac has all the attributes of the higher mind being ruled by Jupiter, being arguably the most spiritual of planets. For this reason the Jupitarian, Sagittarian, is ever read to forgive and recommence a relationship that has faltered by wiping the slate completely clean. But others should know that this should be not taken advantage of as the one born under the sign of Sagittarius has also a fire side and beneath the easy going and magnanimous gestures is a temperament that can turn and crush others just as easily. This is not always evident when reading traditional books on Astrology but is certainly the case. Those born under the sign of Sagittarius can also be somewhat exaggerative in their gestures and there words. If it’s necessary to enter into negotiations to give or receive forgiveness it’s best to say as little as possible. Allow the power of your ruling planet Jupiter to re-engage the other person and re-ignite those flames of love once again.
As a Saturnine being born under the sign of the Goat, Capricorn forgiveness is also not always easy for you. You’re cautious by nature so that gives you the edge in that you are not likely to haphazardly involve yourself with people that let you down. If that is the case it’s probably earlier in life when you are still learning the ropes about relationships. When you’ve been burned a few times you’re likely to learn from your mistakes and so will avoid those people and situations so as to side step any future suffering and emotional turmoil. Depending on where your ruling planet Saturn is stationed at the time you’re born this will also have some marked impact on the way you forgive and forget. Capricorns prefer to learn from their past mistakes rather than repeating them. Because Saturn brings with it a rather pessimistic outlook it’s best for you as with the sign of Scorpio to do your best to release yourself from deep broodings over past hurts and remove thoughts of vengeance. Forgiveness and letting go (I didn’t say forgetting completely) is your ticket to inner peace and spiritual freedom.
Aquarius, you are rather unusual in the way you handle your relationship and the fact that you are unconventional to say the least. In terms of patching up relationships, forgiving and being forgiven, you are likely to be rather unpredictable so it is essential for you to decide whether you do want to forgive someone or not. You may need time to draw your conclusions and perhaps there may be some conditions attached to the forgiveness. Let me tell you unequivocally this won’t work. True forgiveness has to be unconditional even if it is somewhat unconventional. The progressive mind set of an Aquarian needs freedom on an emotional level to function in its higher aspects. By weighing yourself down with emotional baggage you’ll notice a distinct downgrading of your mental clarity and professional and future success. As mentioned to some of the other signs, forgiveness offers its greatest benefits to those who do the forgiving.
Pisces, being born on the twelfth sign, the most compassionate and self-effacing of Zodiac signs you, out of all of your Zodiac brothers and sisters, are imbued with the ability to forgive unconditionally. I often talk about this ability as being a crucifix on your shoulders, and if you have read my newsletter this month you will note the symbol of the fish is synonymous with the crucifix. I say this because whilst I certainly extol the virtue of forgiveness I also say in the same breath that forgiveness for you should never become a burden or a process of becoming a victim yourself. Never forgive someone for the same misdeed over and over again. This is not unconditional forgiveness, this is, simply foolishness. You too must learn from your mistakes in giving undeserving people far too many chances. Knowing when to forgive and not to forgive is the secret lesson for those of you born under Pisces.
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About the author…..
Ayurveda refers to them as prakruti and offers a depth of knowledge around each and the method to bring them into balance in accordance with our own intrinsic nature on every level of being. It’s important to note there is no better or less than in this respect and all provide variety and what is required for our survival. For emotional and physical well-being it’s about finding self-acceptance – with one’s own intrinsic genetic nature and by accepting and acknowledging these differences in others to bring about understanding, balance and connection.
Is there certainty in this attitude? Absolutely not. Is there actually ever any security as such? Again, absolutely not; relatively; maybe so. When we talk of security we always conveniently push to the back of our minds the idea that the inevitability of death steals away any notion of security. Life always hangs by a thread and we at times are
momentarily shocked into this truth when we occasionally hear of the death of a friend or some tragedy. Saturn is death. It is time, which is the personification of the great Mother, Time Herself, Kali. Once the desire and intensity to live your lif eon your own terms is strong enough, Time itself is kicked to the curb. Death and the fear associated with it are also dismissed.
There is a direct link between thinking, emotions and the complex hormonal chemical balance which is part and parcel of all our biological makeup. A thought is a chemical reaction. Those chemical reactions evoke different responses within the endocrine and nervous system producing domino effects chains of chemical reactions and, depending on the quality of that thought, the nature of the chemical itself. Negative, harsh, aggressive thoughts and emotions tend to produce cortisone and adrenalin in abundant measure. The reverse can be said for happy, loving and generous thoughts, words, feelings and actions and this produces serotonin and endorphins which elevate the spirit and can in fact heal the body as well and this is not just idle fancy. 
